Hmm.. who knows what will become of this..
Thoughts, thoughts, thoughts.. so many, flood my mind. It's imperative that I realize who I
am. I mean who I really am, you know, in Christ. It really is a life or death matter.. So for
the longest of times I just accepted what is seen and what was going on in my head as
truth. But there is a time when one must rise up. One must Choose the TRUTH. The
choice is not something that is made only once in a person's life. It is an ongoing
battle. Sometimes even down to the very seconds in a day..maybe it's every 30 seconds,
maybe every hour, or every other hour... even so it is a constant choice that must be
made. No matter what one feels, a choice of FAITH must be made. I may feel sad,
worthless, useless, abandoned, forgotten, looked over, etc. But it's really how I choose to
respond to those feelings. Do I choose to say..hey, that is right, I am a sad hopeless case,
And in
turn forfeit the battle and basically hand it over to the Enemy? That is a choice we all must
make throughout our days. And let's be honest, a lot of times.. the Enemy is YELLING
and God is not. I believe God tests us. In that, I believe during certain seasons in one's
life, the Enemy will be blaring with lies, and God will allow that. I believe that somedays
the lies we are told in our minds and the physical actions of others around us will coincide.
I believe that that is partially because we (body of believers) live for an unseen place.
We
live for something we have never physically laid eyes on or physically touched. We are
aliens in this place called "the world". Yet, we are soo acquainted with this place, so used
to how things work. Here is mostly about what is seen with the eye. Many have accepted
the "I have to see it to believe it" concept (speaking mainly of nonchristians). And lots of
us others (christians) have forgotten that this
isn't it for us. Our lives are not simply about climbing the corporate ladder or getting that
car or having a family and 2.5 kids. Our lives are worth much more
than simply acquiring materials and money. One must reflect upon his or her experiences
on earth. We have never lived anywhere else, so how would we know how to live for a
totally different world? Basically, there is more than meets the eye.
By choosing God
we're choosing a totally different way of living. A life of FAITH. I personally don't believe
a life of faith consists of one making all his/her decisions in life and then factoring God in
at some point. Or asking God to give one his/her desires without His consultation
in the first place. Or living exactly like everyone else in the world with no evidence of the
Holy One in one's life. As sons and daughters of God, we are given what we're needed
to live a life we're called to live. We must learn how to live for Eternity. Jesus is MORE
than enough and we should fight to LIVE that out daily. For me personally, that's been
one of the Biggest struggles recently. Eventhough everything around us may seem to
be out of control or we may seem to be alone and what satan tells us and the actions of
others line up.. there are other things going on.
Our battle is not simply against each other,
although the way we are used to living, it is hard not to act on that. Our battle is against
spiritual forces (Eph. 6). I believe that God may allow certain actions to happen at the
same time a
lie that matches the action happens, to remind us that what we see with our eyes is not all
there is. We must rise up and take our place in the Army of God. Mediocre Christianity
doesn't get anyone very far. I want ALL that God has for me. I want to KNOW Him.
When I say I want to KNOW Him, that doesn't mean I want to know "about him" or his
"character traits" (these things are great to know, but I also want to go deeper) I want to
enter into a whole new dimension of Intimacy with Him. And
honestly, to truly know God will be a vicious fight. We must fight for the ones we love.
We must learn for what and for whom we are living. | 
